Why she married a Black man
"As most of you know, my husband Al is black. Actually I hate that word, but I'm going to use it this one time so just in case you're new here, you'll understand exactly what I mean. But Al's actually just a human being, like me, who happens to have brown skin. We have two human children who happen to have skin closer to the color of mine. Around here, on the rare occasion that our skin comes up at all, which probably isn't any more often than it does in your family, we talk about pink skin and brown skin. I'd toss out the currently-trendy, 'In my family, we don't see color,' but I just think that's dumb. Of course we see color. We see color for exactly what it is: The qualities of light reflected off of things, or in this case, people."
That's Megan Cobbs. And she doesn't deny that she noticed her husband's brown skin when they first met. "After that, he was just Al," she says.
Megan and Al met when they were working together and she fell in love. But when she asked her friend whether it was a good idea to date him, her friend automatically assumed she was talking about his skin color while all the while, she was referring to the fact that they were co-workers. And her friend's reply was: "I couldn't do it, but if you can, I think it'll be great."
Below are her reasons for marrying Al, her husband of 10 years:
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In conclusion, she says:
"So why DID I marry a black guy? I'm afraid this may be a bit of a yawner because it sounds so much like anyone else's marriage story. My initial attraction for Al came from our easy friendship, his amazing listening skills, the way he made me laugh (he's the funniest person I've ever met) and our shared faith. I married him because we loved, trusted, respected and easily understood one another on an honest, open, totally-vulnerable level. We could see a clear way to use our natural gifts to support and serve one another in healthy, affirming ways. It's that simple. I married Al for the similar reasons a white girl marries a white guy or a black girl marries a black guy or a green toad marries a purple hedgehog. Because he's awesome, he loves me back, and I want him right here beside me forever."
To read more about the myths she dispelled on why White women marry Black men, read her article on FriedOkra. Below: Megan and Al
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